I am in love with Taylor Swift. We have never met, and the likelihood is that this love story will be forever unrequited. Her ignoring of my tweet streams and adoring insta-pics will provide perfect fodder for my inevitable Tay-esque country album, BUT we will live our lives as perfect strangers. I'm okay with that. I love her, just as much as my pal Maxine loved that painter from the Xfactor and my mum lusts after Colin Firth. For some reason though, girl crushes get a bad press.
It's always been this way really. I should stress that my "love" here Is entirely plutonic... Not that it matters, BUT really loving Taylor Swift in particular, seems more dangerous than waking through a 'yes' bar in Glasgow with NO tattooed on your forehead. I'm cool with adoring her from a distance. Enough politics... Now here's for the serious girl power bit... What is it about young girls taking inspiration from influential, successful women that upsets people so much? I appreciate that there are flaws in twerking your way through life and serious potholes in Beyonce's drunk in love theory BUT what's wrong with admiring the tenacity of talented ladies!
As in independent woman (of sorts) I find it grossly prejudice to define a woman's capacity as a role model by the cut of their t shirt OR a play by play of their romantic disasters. Some of the most POWERFUL women in the world are yet to figure out men. The best of them have saved the time wasted on heartbreak figuring out loving themselves first. This sass dates back to Cleopatra - trust me, it's something to be admired.
I see a gorgeous, talented woman achieving something awesome, whether it's making music, writing for a magazine or winning gold and I'm PROUD. Once you brush aside that primitive jealous instinct and self pity, all that's left is girl power. Yes!
It's so much easier to write a list of all the faults in someone's face than it is to stop and see the beauty in it. Most of the people you admire are people who have learnt to love ALL the faults you could EVER throw at them- or at least learnt to use them to their advantage... These are smart ladies! I have always been uncomfortable in my own skin. The loudest voice in my head is my own, telling myself I CANT and DONT. I believe that true success is measured in your inner monologue. Speak good things.
I'd really recommend everyone watch Patricia Bright's video on feeling good. She lets you know that it's okay NOT to be like your girl crush... It's true that comparison is the thief of joy. BUT remember, is it possible to really LOVE someone without comparing yourself to them.
Image wise, I'd love boobs like Katy P, Taylor's legs, Rhianna's bum, Jlaw's face, and well, Marilyn's anything, but that's normal. No one likes what they've got, but the person sitting next to you on the train has probably spotted something on your face that they wish they had... AND you're the lucky one if that's confidence! Looking at beautiful people is like looking at art, it's gorgeous but it's all about the subtext. Make yourself a page turner not just a pretty cover.
Back to my Taylor obsession. I think she's a great role model! (So long as you don't ask Harry Styles). She inspires so many girls to do what they love and shake off the hate they are giving themselves. She also provides the soundtrack to every teen/twenty something's life movie... But I wouldn't expect anyone else to agree with me! She's the inspiration I need some days to see my own potential and say, if she can do it, I can do it.
Perhaps Zoella is a more relatable example. She Is a gorgeous, self motivated gal who made success for herself despite her own insecurity. She is probably the most PUBLICISED and real example of someone overcoming their own expectations. I recently read a disturbing article where a journalist attacked the YouTube sensation, childishly labelling her irritating and self important. This frustrated me so much, it's just not the point. Girls don't love ZOE because they want to be here - they love her because they already are her. I hope she read that article and smiled - and felt sorry for the writer who totally missed the point of a 'girl crush'.
Who are you crushing on?